Match reports

Each CPAFC game is followed with a match report composed by either James Caves (No7) or myself (No.5) it depends which one of us can be arsed really.

Because of limited space available on this website not all match reports are available so please hit the link below to our sister website (www.cpafc.piczo.com) and click on the pages titled match reports or alternatively individual match reports are available on request by emailing myself at a0356691@hud.ac.uk

Below are two match reports from Season Three

CPAFC 5 – 3 Sporting Lesbian

CPAFC’s march continues – seven wins out of seven- our latest against a Sporting Lesbian side in danger of slipping out of contention in the promotion race. CPAFC have now cemented their place at the top of the league with a massive 21 points.

CPAFC yet again did it the hard way with a narrow 5 - 3 victory coming after they found themselves a goal down within the first five minutes. It wasn’t until James Wood broke the deadlock that the game began to go the way of CPAFC. He took the congratulations but the architect was our very own Scottish wizard Graeme Kennedy, who with his back to the Sporting Lesbian goal inside his own half hooked the ball forward into the path of Wood. Whether it was a hopeful pass or sheer brilliance, it did not matter to James Wood, who collected the ball, left two defenders trailing before coolly slotting his shot under the advancing goalkeeper.

There was a feeling that it was game over already but the Sporty muff divers dug deep and really made a game of it. James Caves played a blinder scoring two superb goals his first came after taking the ball from a James Wood rebound and stroking the ball into the empty net. James Wood twice rattled the opposition’s bar with two brilliant low drives but lady luck was well and truly shining for their goalkeeper as with him beaten he relied on the woodwork and the ball was hurried to safety on two occasions.

Abuse from the home support was missed as Chris Jones was away scouting in scandanavia but I hear he’ll be there screaming shouting and waving his pom poms next week.

The next goal came from that good looking little fella Danny Cassidy who chased the ball down and made their defence panic into conceeding. Cassidy a future Latvian international chased the ball, won the tackle, had a shot take a wicked deflection from the advancing defender and left the goal keeper wrong footed and helpless. The goal however has cruelly been taken away from Cassidy by the dubious goal panel which has credited it as an own goal. Don’t think I wont appeal though!!!!

This gave CPAFC a bit of breathing space at 3-2 but with the athletic dykes on such good never say die form it wasn’t long until we felt the pressure.Jim Boorman finding himself at the top end of the pitch won a penalty as their defender meandered into the goal mouth but James Wood failed to take advantage of the opportunity and CPAFC again were biting their nails.

The nerves were settled slightly though when Graeme Kennedy pumped up with his 12th goal of the season with a trademark low placed shot. James Caves finished off the game with the second of his brace and 6th goal of the season.Man of the match was given to or trusty goalkeeper who saved everything thrown at him or should that be kicked?We have now beaten everyone in this league and are well on course to finish in our highest ever position. Division six is just on the horizon and all we have to do is keep winning!

Well done lads!

Hopefully I’ll play a bit better next week as my metartarsals should be healed so see you all there it’s a seven o’clock kick off against barely athletic.

Bring it on!

Your Chairman, Website designer, Club historian, Club mascot and sports reporter of the year 2006

Danny Cassidy MBE

OHS 5 - 7 CPAFC

Dearest Sirs

Last night was possibly our toughest match to date and yet we came out on top once again.

OHS were undeniably a very good side, skilful and powerful but so are we nowadays and in patches we played them off the park.

Last week we had a finesse about our play and were keeping the ball for long periods. Last night that was not possible as we were hurried and harassed by their team constantly. However we did not lose our heads, we just stepped up our game.

More than any other match that I can remember there was passion from every player. (and even from the stands - thanks to mr jones)

Every goal felt like it meant the world and was greeted with cheers, clenched fists and gritted teeth!!!!!!!!!

Once again goals were coming from all over the place and were all of a superb quality. Our opener from mr Cassidy was a cheeky side foot from his own half that flew past the keeper, leaving him stunned. Mr Patel also scored with an excellent strike then shot past everybody. Even I managed to claim a goal that should go down in CPAFC history. However Man of the Match Mr Kennedy, the hat-trick hero of the night came up with a strike to rival even last weeks effort from Saleem. Out wide he caught the ball with such ferocity i'm amazed the pigs skin didn't explode. Of course between the posts Khanny had a typical performance, letting in a few sloppy goals, throwing the ball to each of their players, and making some incredible saves that defy the laws of physics.

This victory has put us 5 points clear at the top of the league and with a superior goal difference, however we cannot take our foot of the gas and must continue this run of form. Next week is the match we have all been waiting for 'Sporting Lesbians'.

Dr James Caves